Nightmarriage

I'm having nightmares again.
I woke up, reached for the remote and
watched the tail end of CBS Sunday Morning,
pretty moose in ponds and swamps.
Maybe I should play video games again,
turn off the open sign on my brain,
"Be back in five, really,"
or maybe I should never do anything "again"
ever.
I suppose every poem I write should be
about you, it'll help
me cope, it'll help me organize things,
maybe, one of these times
I'll come across your name
in a thesaurus.
What's a synonym for your name, anyway?
Lovely,
natural,
compelling,
I'm not going to use hackneyed words like "wondrous"
anymore because I'm sick of it.
Wait, was that a synonym for your name,
or am I just scared again?